Writing Doodles: writing doodle - day 14

In order for us to stay in Joplin, Missouri, several things had to happen: a long term stay hotel or a furnished apartment that rented by the week and would take an overly enthusiastic puppy; doggie day care or a pet sitter who could come in a couple of times per day; a trip to a drug store to replicate sundries Grandpa needed during his hospital stay; and a call to work and my landlord explaining what exactly had happened.

I should have been more specific with the pet sitter. She owned an older dachshund and brought him whenever she came to the hotel suite I rented. The two animals got along and played fairly well together. There had been no reports of fighting or dominance issues. In fact Carrie was doing a little obedience work with Hazel to get her to sit, stay, and come on command. Must have been the behavior modeled by Fritz that got Hazel to behave so quickly.

Never did I think about relevant questions other than, "Are his shots up to date?"

No.

I should have asked, "Has he been fixed?"

Why?

When Hazel showed up, she was a mere puppy of but a few weeks old. My vet recommended waiting to have her spayed until she was closer to a year old. He mentioned that I'd have to get her through heat, but the house I was in had a fenced yard and she never left the apartment without me. On the road, she was always with someone and we didn't go to very many public parks since her behavior wasn't always perfect.

It never occurred to me that an eleven year old dog who was significantly smaller than my lovely girl could actually do the deed and knoc

k her up. Even worse, I didn't know until she was almost five weeks into the eight week pregnancy.

"I knew it," my grandfather said. "You are finally going to do me proud."

Finally? Gee thanks.

"The family name will now live on." He beamed at me. It was the first and only time since I was six that he beamed, and back then it was because I didn't cry when I wiped out on my two-wheeler and bloodied both of my knees.

"With a dog?"

"Sure. Hazel's licensed and it is to you, right?"

I nodded.

"Ergo, all of her puppies will also be XXX."

"I don't think that's how this works." We were going to engage in something long and protracted, I could just tell. "Besides, Micheal and his wife have three kids."

"Don't like them."

"And what about-"

Before I could say a name, he cut me off. "You're my favorite. And you are my heir apparent."

Just what I always wanted? "What about Dad or Uncle Ben?"

"Nah. They won't learn anything from the old man. What I have to pass on to you is invaluable. Besides, you've got my nose not to mention animal magnetism. Oh and did I ever show you pictures of me when I was young? You look just like me."

Perfect. I look like a baby bald eagle. Small, frail, and can't keep my mouth shut.

I know the effort was unconscious when my index finger ran down the length of my nose. I'd never thought of it being the typical XXX pronounced Roman nose before, but I don't spend a lot of time gazing at it in the mirror. As long as it works, I don't really care that much what it looks like. In pictures, before I broke it in high school, I always thought of my nose as being a little on the small side. Before he said anything, I moved my hand to cover my ear, was it now cauliflower like Grandpa's?

Until ten minutes ago, the only real concern I had was the fact my hair has mostly grown back grey and now the hairline is definitely receding. Even on this trip, I run or walk every day and usually take Hazel. On the days that I've been on the road too long, I take Grandpa for ice cream somewhere and then I do exercises in the RV park after we get back.

One of us is delusional and I'm beginning to think it is me.

"Get my wallet. I want to show you something special," he said. "Excuse us, ladies." The nurses nodded to the two of us and quietly left the room.

What passed as a closet was about half the size of a gym locker. There was just enough space to hang one pair of pants and a shirt, one pair of shoes, and a baggie of his incidentals. I had removed his credit cards and ID when he was admitted, but left the pictures and a few dollars.

The well worn, black wallet flipped open and he removed two items. The first was a red, cherry flavored condom which expired eleven years before. The other was a small black and white snapshot of someone who looked remarkably like me, holding an infant.

I could have been his doppelganger. Well now there was no way my father could ever again question my mother about my parentage.

I plucked the condom from his hand and tossed it in the trash.

"You can't do that," he said.

"I'll buy you one that hasn't expired," I said.

"But that' my lucky condom."

"Lucky condom?"

"Sure. No one has gotten pregnant since I started carrying it."

"Just how old are the women you've been dating?"

"Twenty-five, maybe thirty?" He counted on his fingers. Years younger? "Years old. I like to break them in before they have any bad habits."

Now he sounded just like me.

Despite the fact it was only noon according to the clock in his room, I knew it had to be five o'clock somewhere.

~~

the old man, aka Blondie, had a slightly better day today ... made sure I didn't stray from the keyboard ... but didn't require too much writing

~~ below is supposed to be a one evening project ... if it only takes one evening to do that, you've got to be doing something wrong.